“Rough day?”

“Typical.”

“You love it, you live for it, you were born to do it, I’m the same way. Everybody tells me to get a life, although I don’t know why.. I find life to be terribly overrated. It’s actually quite boring when it’s not disappointing. Say what you will about what we do, but boring it is not.”

Leo: Mr. President.

Bartlet: A morphine drip, and we can skip the formalities. I might get one myself… wheel it into meetings with the joint chiefs. You’re not fired, Leo. You can delegate, work part-time. Bring the morphine with you for all I care.

Leo: You… You remember… what you told me… when you offered me the job?

Bartlet: “I need you to jump off a cliff.”

Leo: And I did. And I’d do it again. But you need a new… chief of staff.

Bartlet: We came here to put the job first. Spend our lives for something that would outlast us. I just thought we’d have a longer line of credit is all. I’m gonna need that list of names.

Leo: Only one name.

Joe: I know that when life expectancy goes up, that’s not victimizing undertakers.

CJ: Well argued, though I do hate you and everything you stand for.

Joe: Claudia Jean, you’ve only known me for four minutes. Usually it takes people the better part of an hour to hate me and everything I stand for.

CJ: I’m the Press Secretary, boo-boo. I don’t have that kind of time.

C.J.: Duchamp is the father of Dadaism.

TOBY: I know.

C.J.: The dada of Dada.

TOBY: It’s like there’s nothing you can do about that joke. It’s coming, and you just have to stand there.